In The Weird News Section

So i was chilling at home one day right, i was incredibly bored cuz my phone and laptop batteries were flat, so i decided to open a news magazine i saw lying around. Guess what i saw in the bizarre news section, remember my post about Crazy Church Names, well this church doesn't have a weird name, the name is White Tail Church or so, but their mode of worship is just plain crazy. Apparently in the church the congregation worships in the nude, asin butt naked with their instruments for bedroom tango put on display for the church to see. Like seriously i'm meant to come to church naked every Sunday and worship with a congregation that has females, what if i get a boner, would I be sent to the sinners corner or something. Detecting male first timers would be sooo easy, every guy with a boner is a first timer.

According to the pastor they worship naked because that's how God made man and that the most important moments in Christ's life happened when he was naked, when he was born, when he was crucified and when he arose. Not sure my bible says Jesus was naked when he was crucified and when he arose sure it stated that his clothes were left in the tomb but he wasn't naked when he appeared unto people was he. The pastor justified their style of worship by describing nudity as a great equalizer, he said people can't judge each other based on their articles of clothing so its impossible to segregate by wealth (true but won't segregation by what you're packing become the new thing). What will they come up with next.

I'll just leave this here

Two days after reading about the church I was chatting with a friend and he sent me this link. The link links to (English right) a page where the first thing you see is "Pornhub promises to Plant a tree for every 100 videos watched". Basically Pornhub a popular porn site it seems, are now environmentalists, I don't know porn sites so never heard of em *looks away*, they are planning too give America more wood, pun intended. Well i was surprised to read about this cuz i never would have guessed an adult entertainment firm (wonder why they call it adult entertainment, it entertains kids too) would embark on such a project.
My friend decided to drop this line
"I'm stroking my wood so there will be more wood, call me first hokage"

Some of you probably already guessed who that friend is. Now guys have an excuse for getting caught watching porn, if you get caught you can just be like "I was just doing my part to save the environment" and if its the significant other that caught you, you could just turn the situation in their favor and be like "Do you hate the earth, i'm just trying save it.",  you won't win but at least you had an excuse.