My Awesome Mystery Girl

 Why me? Why now?? Why her???
A week and a day ago i met the most awesome girl ever when i decided to attend a program i knew would be boring and i ended up randomly making my way to the seat right next to hers then we got to talking. She was amazing, i have never hit it off with anyone that well, that fast in my life, as we kept talking she kept surprising me with with her uniqueness and she had the ability to do one thing that got me even more attracted to her. She could make me laugh. Not a lot of girls can make me laugh, i often fake it just not to disappoint them but she was almost doing a better job of making me laugh than i was at making her. Being with her was crazy fun and she saved me from the program cuz as i later found out a friend of mine almost considered shooting himself to escape the boredom. As we kept talking i realised she knows quite a number of people, at least a lot more than i do and it dawned to me, there's no way under heaven a girl this awesome would be single or at least she would have quite a lot of guys going after her and though i don't mind competition i hate joining queues (-__-) since the other guys might have made way more progress than I.

Weird Phobias

A while ago some friends were bored and decided to google phobias and we saw a lot of weird stuff. People are sacred of some very stupid stuff, i picked out some of the weird ones. To see the full phobia list click Phobia List

Ablutophobia- Fear of washing or bathing.[Why some people sink]
Agyrophobia- Fear of streets or crossing the street.[people who never leave home]
Alektorophobia- Fear of chickens. [How can you eat such a scary beast]
Amathophobia- Fear of dust.
Amaxophobia- Fear of riding in a car.[I shall walk because cars are evil and scary]
Ambulophobia- Fear of walking.[I shall drive even indoors]
Amychophobia- Fear of scratches or being scratched.[True Nigerians cant have this]
Anablephobia- Fear of looking up.[Just plain weird]
Ancraophobia- Fear of wind. (Anemophobia)
Androphobia- Fear of men.[So i scare some people just cuz of my gender, sexist bastards ]
Anglophobia- Fear of England or English culture, etc.[They are evil they colonized us]
Anuptaphobia- Fear of staying single.[I know some people who have this]
Aphenphosmphobia- Fear of being touched. (Haphephobia)[I have this when i'm in a packed bus or cab]

The Bro Code

Everyone knows this

Everyone knows what the bro code is, if you don't its either you used to live on Mars or you live in the desert and just discovered entertainment, but nonetheless you're a reader and i have to explain. The bro code is a set of rules (more like guidelines) that has governed the way guys act with their bros for ages (it dates back to the cavemen). The bro code should never be broken, its like a pact between real bros, and any bro who breaks the bro code can be forgiven until he breaks it again where after he could still be forgiven (basically bros are very forgiving).

Even the Knights lived by it

Sneaky Exams

Exams have a reputation for being sneaky, showing up sooner than you expect and this semester has to be the worst of all. This week happened to be our mid semester test week, and as the name implies wouldn't it make sense to have the test in the middle of the semester? But guess what in three weeks exams begins, i still have a tough time believing it but yes in three short weeks after what was supposed to be the middle of the semester we will begin our exams. This became more evident with the release of our exam timetable, and when i just decided to get started with the girls too.

It seems i need to buckle up for the exams, its not like my tests were awesome, i'm just trusting God i didn't do as well as i would have liked, in both coding courses i'm sure i invented new ways for writing codes, i'm sure the lecturer would understand and award me points for innovation, I hope. Anyways its time to become ultra serious, i guess the fact that we read for our tests so close to the exams makes it easier to read. 

Letter To My Younger Self

I saw on a blog that writing a letter to your younger self could help you in some way I'm yet to figure out, so here i am with my letter.

                                                                                                     My room,

                                                                                                     My school,

                                                                                                     Nigeria.

                                                                                                     Sometime in October 2013.

Hey Mini Me,

           Dude what's up, how are things, hope all is good, I'm not really sure how far back I'm writing so if you get this and you're not yet in secondary school just try to convince our parents to move you guys away from that Ekiti place to Lagos, OK maybe not Lagos, too much traffic, i hate traffic, Abuja or even Ibadan would be fine as long as i, i mean you leave before the whole Yoruba accent issue begins. Now please wait until you are in secondary school to read the rest or if you can't wait mail it to your future self in secondary school.

  

            Mini me the future for you involves a lot of hardships, if you can prevent yourself from changing school three different times, just stick with one and if you could make that one a rich kid school, scratch that the tough days make good stories so don't go to a rich kid school, and i met a lot of cool peeps in those schools so just skip one school probably the second school i suffered a lot there.

            Mini me if you up liking this short Igbo girl who is in JSS3 when you're in SS1 don't be all shy just walk up and talk to her and if you end up doing the same thing i did and chickening out at every chance you get which would be a lot! just move on to another girl and don't get hung up on her for years only to find out she doesn't like you for no sensible reason. And ease up on the good guy stuff, being Mr goody goody (and I'm not talking about the goody goody chocolate we both love) didn't help much.

           And lastly don't let our parents trick you into going to Covenant, its gonna suck for the most part and you would soooo not like it here, but you would also meet great people here, and if you end up coming anyways don't be like me and lose yourself in your laptop for two years before realising there are other things like socializing, well that all you can actually do for fun in this university. And make sure you take your spiritual life more seriously, it gets harder to do later.

           Well in all things mini me trust God and always be awesome, not that i have to tell you right.

                                                                                                             

                                                                                                         Your Future Self in Uni,

                                                                                                                    

                                                                                                          Mega Kayode.

Stale Gist: Olympus Has Fallen vs White House Down

I know this is very old news but since i just watched White House Down i couldn't help myself, a while back peeps kept arguing about which of the two White house takeover summer movies was better, i couldn't join the argument because at the time i had not seen White House Down (WHD) but now i have and i have to say i prefer it by a mile to Olympus Has Fallen (OHF). Guys in favor of OHF kept saying stuff like "Anyone who prefers WHD doesn't have a brain in their head" and "Anyone who prefers WHD doesn't deserve to talk to me cuz they lack sense" but in my opinion anyone who prefers OHF probably got their brain replaced with horse shit and probably have their eyes stationed in their ass because i don't see how OHF was in anyway better than WHD, sure the infiltration in WHD was too easy but it kills OHF in every other aspect of movie making known to man. The only excuse for preferring OHF is that you mistakenly switched the names and  you thought WHD was OHF, other than that you need to find a way to get your eyes out of your ass.

Ok on a serious note i was just kidding about the horse shit and eyes in ass stuff, both movies were good but in my opinion WHD was more interesting.

Kris And Bruce Split Up :The Truth Or Just For Publicity

The news now is that Kris and her husband Bruce have split up but it seems they're not getting a divorce. I can't say i didn't see this coming, though I'm not a fan of the Kardashians I've seen a few of their episodes on E! and its obvious that Kris assumed the role of the 'man' in their relationship, she's the one who makes the rules and Bruce just supports her and if he's not happy with her (and that happened a lot) he'll act like a kid and go to his room angry, i said that cuz i watched an episode when he got mad at her and the next thing  he did was go into the garage with a pillow and an air mattress and yes he slept there.

Kris is a fame hugger, she  loves the spotlight a little too much, she'll do anything to remain in the news and I'm guessing that got to Bruce (that or this could all be a huge publicity stunt wouldn't be the first time). Their family has been riddled with a lot of problems anyways from Kim's issues with Ray Jay and then moving on to various (A LOT) of guys before getting Kanye(he's a perfect Kardashian seeing how his name starts with a K and how he has issues and all) who named their baby North West(what a stupid name, i pity the baby), and then Kourtney(I like her more than the other two) and her issues with Scott and the whole giving birth outside wedlock thing, and then Khloe and her issues with her husband Lamar (he probably started using drugs cuz of the Kardashian spirit influencing him). The only ones i pity are Kendall and Kylie, why'd they have to be raised around the others.

The Kardashian family has been really blessed by Loki the god of mischief, and his best agent is Kris, i don't know why but i believe all their issues originate from her somehow. They all need to go and get a psychic to get the spirit out of their household or they can try the Nigerian method and sacrifice 2 goats, alligator skin, 4 baboon balls, 2 virgin spiders and 2 kegs of palm wine(the gods have to drink after working) to Ifa and Sango (just in case one god isn't enough) and then the spirit chasing them from their village will vanish.

The Friend Zone

  

 I finally decided to join the crowd and post about the friend zone. I’ve had my fair share of experiences where someone (not necessarily myself) got abandoned in the friend zone with basically no hope of escape.

                              
                                  How To know You’re In The Friend Zone

• -          When she likes talking to you about the guys she likes.

• -          When she isn’t concerned about her appearance when she’s with you.

• -          When she tells you stuff like “Thanks hun” or “Sorry love”.

• -          When she asks about one of your friends every time she sees you but once that’s done she’s in a hurry to leave.

Killer Lines In A Boring Class

My friends and I were bored in a class today(to know how boring my classes can get click HERE) so we decided to spit some lines to pass the time. Tell me which you like best (we suck at it by the way).

Chima
-My lines are so hot they make the sun sweat.
-I'm running this track, Bolt
-I'll freeze you like Sub zero finishing
-I'm hitting the core, Intel
And his bullshit legendary line: I’m so fast, my eyeballs dodge #gbam


Chiemela
-I'm so high, i'm getting weed from birds.
-My lines are strong cause I give punchlines without gloves.
-My flow so sick it will leave you dead in the living room.
-My flow so sick its killing me softly
-I got many lines in my head, sporting waves

Me
-This guy is so boring, call him mole rat
-My lines so strong, call it morning wood
-I'm so high aliens look up to me.
-I flow so fast and so sick its like i was bitten by a mosquito riding a Bugatti.

Yep we were on that 2 Chainz shit today, the class was just that boring.